So yesterday I finished my final paper which completed the course POL 303-The American Constitution. I was really nervous when the class started, I knew very little about the American Constitution which is really sad since I am an American. I realized there is a lot about my own country I do not know. I really learned a lot and really enjoyed it. I have always been interested in criminal cases and have always loved reading books about the subject, and honestly I felt like I was in heaven reading my textbook, because it had real life cases in it. I thought this class was going to be unbelievably difficult, but my teacher gave me amazing feedback about every assignment. I am also thrilled to say my classmates gave me excellent encouragement when they responded to my discussion board posts. I have earned every point in the course that has been possible so far. I have three more grades I am waiting to hear back on, the big one is on my final paper which counts as 25 out of the possible 100 points. So I am really hoping I did well on the final paper.
I have been trying to learn to deal with the fact that eventually I am going to get a grade lower than an A and that those grades are still good, but for some reason I feel like I have to get an A to prove something about myself. I guess it stems from constantly feeling like a failure, and apparently book work is one thing in this world that I am good at. I have been toying with the idea of checking into a leave of absence from school for a short bit. I have been attending since October 2008 and during that time I have only had about a 2 week break. I have started feeling kind of burnt out as when one course ends a new one starts the next day. Like my POL 303 course ended yesterday (Monday) and my new course SOC 101-Intro to Sociology begins today. So there is just no breathing room. Therefore I feel like a small break might be good, before I start doing my work halfheartedly and earning grades that I will not be pleased with. What do you all think? Do you think taking a break is a good idea or should I just keep pushing on. When I say a small break I mean a month or a few weeks, nothing too extensive. I have until October 2012 before I graduate and there are only 1 week breaks scheduled at Christmas time. I really would love some opinions and advice about this.
If I do decide to take my break I am going to throw myself into my writing. I have been missing it terribly recently. I find myself thinking about it when I am doing school work, and feeling guilty that my characters are literally stuck in my mind, not able to be free. One of my goals in life is to have at least one book published, and I need to give this a really good shot, because I will always regret it if I don't. I also want to start reading more often. I have been so busy with school work and daily life lately that I haven't gotten the chance to pleasure read in weeks and it's been that long since I have gotten to write for pleasure. Once I finish school work my body is tired of reading and typing and I just like to sit and veg out. So I am thinking a small break from school might be good all around. Then I can go back at it with a vengeance. I have also been toying with the idea of doubling up on a few courses to see how that goes, and maybe only do it the one time, but it would allow me to graduate that much sooner.
I am sorry for those that actually read my blog that I haven't updated lately, but I honestly feel like I talk about the exact same things each time so I feel like there is not much point in blogging. if those are you are actually reading this, please reply so that I know someone out there actually wants me to continue updating. Thanks so much everyone!
