So....it's...a/an....

A! I got my final grade back for the last I completed last week. I'm thrilled that I ended the class with an A. I earned 93.5% for the class. I was worried that my final paper and power point presentation wouldn't get as good of a mark as I wanted. I ended up getting 18 out of 20 points on that. I really wanted to do better, but I will accept that score. I have completed five classes now, and so far they've all been with A's. This class was the lowest score % wise that I've had. It was a really informative class, but it was much more technical than I had thought it would be. I guess it's a good thing though. I can take what I've learned and actually apply it to future classes, and other experiences. I guess that's all I have to say.

Where does the time go?

I can't believe I haven't updated in so long. I guess I was waiting until I had something new to say, but really it's just the same old. Tatem turned 5 on the 21st! I can't believe it, she's such a beautiful little girl, and so precious. I can still remember her cries as she entered the world, and I remember holding her for the first time. Ugh, she's my baby, and now she's not a baby. She is very adamant now to tell you she's a big girl, and she is. I turned 24 on April 23rd. I really don't feel any different, but I've felt older than my years for a long time now. I don't mean that I feel wiser either, I just feel old. I feel tired, worn out, burnt out, scared, depressed, just overwhelmed. We are pretty sure the foreclosure date will be coming in the mail any day now. So we are hoping and praying to get something settled so that, we will not actually be foreclosed on. This is our home, we have no where to go, nor do we want to leave. We are both still looking for work, and I feel it, something is going to happen very soon. Just pray for us. School is going okay, I am waiting to hear my final grade for my last class. The teacher is taking his sweet time grading our final papers and power point projects. My whole grade rides on this since it was 20% of our grade and it's the only thing that isn't graded. I started my history class on the 21st and the things we are studying don't interest me in the least. I feel this class will be the one that breaks my 4.0 GPA. But I am going to give it my all and that's all I can do.

On the 21st Matt and I had a nice dinner with my parents at their house, then just hung around a bit. On my actual birthday we went out to dinner with Matt's mom and his 7 year old brother. I didn't recieve anything such as a material present, I did recieve a card from one of the woderful ladies of BNA. I did get a lot of Happy Birthday wishes online though.

I am just hoping that I can take this year, and turn it around. Turn our lives around. I am going to try. I'm tired of being a talker, a thinker and a planner. I want to be a do-er.

The day of judgment has passed.

Thanks for the good luck wishes on my court appearance and for all of the advice you all have given me. I went to court on Monday April 13th. I hardly slept at all the night before. I was so nervous. It really wasn't a big deal. I just went there, sat and waited as called people by last names. I spoke with the lawyer for Capital One and he told me that I could deny the debt, accept it, or ask for time to seek a lawyer. I went ahead and admitted the debt was mine, because it was, and there was no point is asking for time to get a lawyer when I had already had a month to try to get one, and legal aid services had denied me. I was the second to last person on the docket. I think I waited about an hour before I was called before the judge. I told the judge it was my debt and that I was fully accepting it, that I don't have employment and that I can't get an attorney to fight it. I told him I just want it over with. So they entered the judgment against me meaning, that Capital One has the right to collect every cent that they wanted plus court fees. Which ends up being just under $1,500. Although the lawyer that was representing Capital One told me that since I am not working they can't collect. He said to call when I have some way to work with them. So I guess this means they'll leave me alone for a bit. I thought you all might want to know.

Update On Me

I thought I would give an update on what's happening with me right now, since so many of you have given me advice and support. First I want to thank you all for your advice, and for all of the information such as links that you have given me. Since Spring is here it seems like places are actually starting to hire again, so Matt and I have been applying for jobs like crazy, since there are more available than there has been in a long while. I am hoping we'll get something even if it's just seasonal work. I took the advice that I was given to contact legal aid for representation against the credit card that is suing me. I applied for the legal aid services Wednesday. I called back Thursday and they said to give them 3-5 business days to review my application before contacting them again. So I didn't expect to hear back until next week. I received a letter in the mail from the legal aid services, and they have turned me down They said that since they have limited funding at this time they can not represent me. They said that my case does have legal merit and that I can contact an attorney at my cost. Well, if I could afford to hire a lawyer I could afford to pay the stinking credit card company.

So as it stands I will be attending my court date April 13th without any legal representation. I'm not sure what will happen, but I guess we'll see. I am still working towards getting the money to file a bankruptcy before the rest of the credit cards sue us as well. We stand to lose the house soon unless we can file the bankruptcy before a foreclosure sell date. So, we are just trying to make money any way we can, and hopefully something will pan out soon.

School is still going well, and I am enjoying the computer literacy class I am in. It's more technical than I thought it would be, but I am actually enjoying learning about the parts of the computer we don't usually think about. I really hope I can continue on with school. It took me a long time, and a lot of building my courage up to actually enroll, and now that I am actually doing it, I don't want to have to give it up.

I appreciate everything that you have done to support me.

I have to get this worked out..and fast...

I cant sleep, but I'm so tired. When I sleep I have nightmares. I have to get this money. Things are closing in fast..the walls are starting to crumble. I am in panic mode. I just want to go to sleep and..not wake up. Not so much that I really want to die, I just don't want to wake up. Being awake just means that it's not all a bad dream. Anyone feeling extra rich and willing to give me a loan?

Funny how things can have a double meaning..

I have been noticing that things can have meaning in this life and in a past. It's just so odd, but makes so much sense. I guess that won't make sense to most of you, but for those that understand it..<3

I don't really have much of an update. Things are much the same. Trying to get the money to get this straightened out before I have to go to court. I don't see that this is going to happen. So I am just trying to keep my nerves calm. I am hungry and need a snack..but I am too lazy to get up and make anything.

I really should try to get some sleep. It's 3:52AM, but I just can't sleep. The dream I had last night was enough to keep me from wanting to sleep. I have to do some reading in my text for school and get an assignment done that's due tomorrow. I would get started now, but my eyes are tired. So, I will just have to get some sleep and get to work.

How is everyone? I feel like I have been out of the loop.

A bit of good news for a change....

I got my grades for the two assignments I was waiting on. I scored 3.5 out of 4 and 3.6 out of 4. My overall grade for the class was 94.45% out of 100% which means I got an A!

I have completed 4 classes now and have gotten A's in them all. I have 12 credits now. My 5th class just started Tuesday and it seems like it's going to be hard, but I hope I can keep my grades up. It is Computer Literacy and the prof. likes things very detailed. It's not really about the basics of computers, its actually about the hardware and such. It's a pretty technical class, but I am up for it. I plan to spend some time tomorrow jumping in and reading some assigned chapters. I want to do well on the test next week. Also I had an assignment due Monday that I want to do well on as well.

My final paper for the class has to be 8 pages, excluding the tile and reference page. I also have to have a power point presentation with it. I am already in freak mode about doing well on this. I have chosen to do mine on Robotics. I hope to learn a lot and be able to present what I learn in an orderly fashion. If any of you know any cool websites or books that might help me out with this I'd appreciate it.

My enrollment adviser called me just this evening to congratulate me. I was so surprised. She says my grades are fantastic. She said that I am way up there and that my attendance is perfect. She said that my academic practices are the best of all of the students she handles. She said she has no other students whose grades are where mine are and assured me that I was doing exceptionally well. She's a very sweet lady and I do enjoy talking with her. I am really not used to someone being so excited over my work. I am so happy! She also asked if I had thought about going for my BA when I am done with my Associates. I told her I had thought a little of it, and was interested in Criminal Justice. She says if I decide to go that route she can get me enrolled in a program where some of my credits for my BA could roll over towards a Master's Degree as well. What do you all think? I really don't know about all of this type of stuff. I need some advice. She said I should be on the next Dean's list!!